Lunch / ££ / 6.5/10

After visiting Rudys and Delilahs I found myself on Victoria Street once again for a lunch with friends at The Cosy Club, I put my prejudice for overpriced chain bars to one side. I have drank there a couple of times and not particularly enjoyed the bar area. Loud, brightly lit and not enough seating for such a massive space. I sound as old as the hills saying it but (like its neighbours) the building is beautiful and deserves better. This is the first time I have had food and the experience was remarkably different. Upon arrival I was shown upstairs to a room I didn’t even know existed. Tall ceilings, stained glass windows, oppulent upholstery…… it was a lot more comfortable and grand than I expected. The dining room was busy for 11.30 on a weekday with large parties enjoying brunch.

My mood (and expectations) lifted. As no one was working we decided to start with cocktails and my friend ordered a porn star martini, when it arrived it had a picture on top of it that looked like it belonged on a cruise liner in the 1920’s, we were all in awe. The waitress answered our ‘What is it?’, “how do you do that?’ questions with the simple explanation of rice paper, fine for eating. Eating? Wait what? As she left it became clear the rice paper formed a ‘skin’ on the top of the cocktail that made it quite hard to drink around and despite it being edible by the end of the drink it looked like a washed up jellyfish.

On to the food, the menu has a lot of choice with some brunch options merging into the lunchtime menu. As is now law for larger chains, the menu displayed the calories for each dish, this paralyses me and I nearly always order the lowest calorie option. Scar tissue from growing up in the 80’s and 90’s when I spent every day failing to keep within a 1000 calorie limit. Fishcakes it was.

They arrived on an art deco plate topped with hollandaise, a poached egg and rocket. The fishcakes were lightly fried and they hadn’t scrimped on the fish (as can often be the case) but it lacked depth of flavour. The perfectly poached egg and balanced hollandaise stole the show but there was a reason this was the lowest calorie main on the menu, it was a really small portion.

My friend ordered the Spanish Chicken and it looked delicious and fresh, she ate it all and said it was really good. I had immediate regret over my pious choices based on calorific value. If someone can just erase those 15 years of conditioning and brainwashing thatwouldegreatthankyou. My other friends ordered a vegan burger and poached eggs on sourdough with tomatoes, avocado etc. A kind of brunch pick and mix that I can appreciate – people can modify their order and no one is left with a black pudding/tomato booby prize.

In summary the room is beautiful, the food is good, the service is below average (slow and failing to notice customers while waiting staff were deep in conversation with each other). I probably won’t rush to go back but I had an enjoyable time and while researching this review I have realised the Cosy Club offer a menu without the calories on. I feel like someone somewhere knows there’s a type of person who would rather not be burdoned with the numbers that held such power before they knew better.

Family – due to the restrictions of the building the dining room is only accessible by stairs, they do offer a kids menu but the atmosphere is more grown up.